Go, grow and glow Mom.

In 2017, December 27th to be exact, I gave birth to my daughter, Kinsley. As we know children are a perfect gift from God, and for his blessing I am forever thankful. However, I was not prepared for the complete 180 change parenting brought about. Post-partum depression, anxiety, career changes, and more altered my life in more ways than one. It wasn’t until I was 2 years in the life of a mother, stressed out, burnt out, when I said to myself that I needed to make changes to glow, grow, and GO. I'm often hearing remarks on how I "make it look easy" when in reality, I said to myself that it's time to focus on the ares in my life I know I need to fix, to make a better life for my daughter and I. Don't get me wrong, everyday isn't easy and most days I am looking crazy lol, but I challenged myself to not dwell on what I couldn't change, and be flawless while doing so. Let’s declutter our mind, body, and spirit with these simple steps. Make it look easy sis! It’s that simple!

1. Set a predictable routine

It sound’s cliché but I promise you ; SET A ROUTINE.

I’m not sure about you, but sometimes it feels like I have ADHD as a mother. From the moment my eyes open immediately my brain opens 304843 tabs and I feel like I need to accomplish all of them .. but first coffee. After my first cup of coffee, then I feel like I can map out my day. However, morning time shouldn’t be the time you jump start your day.

As a mother we know that our children thrive on routines. Do you have a daily or night-time routine for yourself and your child? I know you’re probably yelling at the screen saying “I’m a single mother! I have to work, clean, chase after my kids, be a great friend, sister..” I'm a wife! I have to cook for my family, tend to my family, run a business.."

“By the time I sit lay down. what routine?! As long as these kids are fed with some cereal and my house isn’t burned down. We survived”

Trust me, I understand! Where the heck do I have time in the day to plan what our day or night may look like? One thing about setting intentions is the consistency that follows before and after. Be realistic about what works for you in your daily life and set a personal goal to stay consistent. Be intentional about your goals and your routines. Instead of saying, “ I want to.. “ I say, I’m going to the gym at 3:30 pm. Try it out. Change your mind-frame when it comes to accomplishing a goal. You have to see it when it's not tangible.. (thanks E.Thomas)!

Use a calendar. Use your phone and tell Siri.. remind me to get my ish together! Sometimes you just have to give your own self a pep talk.

2. Say No!

Tell your kids no. Tell your family, your spouse, your friends, no. The power of saying no falls in the boundaries that we set for ourselves. Do not tackle on any more than you can, and respectfully let go some tasks that you are not required to do. It’s perfectly okay to only carry a load that bears the weight of your own responsibility. Say no to negative thoughts, feelings, situations that will take you out of your comfort zone. Be respectful in your conversation with professionals to not burn that bridge.

3. Find your village.

Single, married, whatever your motherhood journey is like.. the #1 important thing (besides taking care of yourself and your children). Your village not only consists of your immediate family, but the daycare providers, the business owners you frequent often, that one woman you run into daily at your job who just breathes life .. that’s your village! Join a Mom group. Join community events. NETWORK. You can network with your baby in tow! The more your surround yourself by people who embody the same spirit you have, who identifies your strengths and weaknesses, the more you will feel at ease.

Okay Mommas, don’t kill me on this one lol.. if you can afford .. hire a sitter. Hire a housekeeper. Hire a doula. Do not be afraid in making your life easier. Trust me, we have enough on our plate.

4. Practice self-care

Pour into you- self-care. My favorite self-care routine is my nighttime routine. Honey, that may be the only self-care routine I stick to consistently. My daughter is bathed and in her bed by a certain time, I am showered, face freshly washed, and in bed by 9 pm. Simple, huh? Nothing too fancy, no 8-10 steps that makes it hard to stick to when you’re chasing after a preschooler. My self-care is doing exactly what I say I’m going to do to make the next day an easy process. I make it my duty to go to the gym 3-4 times a week. Once 2:20 hits, I am preparing for the day, my gym items are already packed and, in the car, and I spend at least an hour on cardio/ weight training. Depending on the day, I usually take my daughter to a drop-off play center during the time I work out. This routine has helped my anxiety tremendously. I encourage you to find your own self-care routine and DO IT! . Trust me, momma with 1, 2, 3+ kids, you CAN pour into you. You have no choice BUT to put you first.

5. Spend time in the moment.

We only get one moment in this life. Put down the phone, inhale, exhale and smile.

Allow your mind peace, even if for a few seconds. Your body, spirit and children are owed that much. My philosophy on life is that life is made of peaches; we just make it sour when it doesn't have to be.. :)